Not written all week due to catching the dreaded stomach bug which has been going around. Not pleasant! Off sick on Tuesday I was stressing about all the work mounting up but managed to reason that we are all allowed to be ill some time and work would just have to wait. Normally if I'm off sick I spend intense hours worrying about what's happening only to go back and find that while of course I was missed (!), things are fine. I think though that non sufferers of anxiety worry like this too so don't attribute it to GAD.
I feel with regards to locking up, that I have come to a sticking point. I have improved greatly getting my time down from half hour to between 12-15 mins but I don't seem to be able to improve further. I am still checking as matter of routine but have managed to decrease the amount of checks per item and there are a few things I no longer feel the need to check at all. The CBT book I am reading tells me to try not to check at all (apart from the obvious like shutting windows and locking doors etc.) which I have not done yet because I feel this level of exposure is too much for me. I do believe though that the golden rule of CBT is that no amount of exposure is too much. So from today I will try this out. I'm off to the hairdressers at lunchtime so we'll see how I get on without checking anything but the obvious. I'm quite excited actually as I have recently gone back to blond after five years as a brunette and today I'm having more blond highlights. It's true that being blond is more fun!