Thursday 22 December 2011

Adapting: From order to chaos...

So much has happened recently. I have moved house and started the mammoth task of decorating the whole place. This is why I have not blogged lately. It has all been very stressful. Moving house is obviously stressful enough as it is but when you're doing so much work on it it is tough. There is so much disruption which is something I don't deal with well. At first I felt overwhelmed at what we had set ourselves up for. Now we are more settled and I am getting used to to the fact that it will be an ongoing project and not something which will be sorted quickly - the way I usually likr it. I'm feeling a bit more relaxed about it even though there is still so much to do and the place is a bit of a mess. Of course before we bought the place we knew it needed doing up but I underestimated how much. It will be fantastic when it is finished! All in all I think my anxiety has not been too bad. The first two weeks I felt quite depressed as I realised the state of the house and the timescale to complete it. I like to have a firm idea of when things will be done. I just like to know. But I did not know when. I only knew it would be a long time. There it is - the uncertainty of something unsettling. Unlike with many other anxieties there is no threat involved but this is an anxiety about things being in order rather than dangerous. As exposure therapy suggests though you can overcome the anxiety by living with it and eventually it will fade. We become used to the presence of something uncomfortable. The house it a mess but I am ok - mostly anyway. :0)