Well now I can tell you about my unconventional OCD/Anxiety combat plan. Karate! Because I am anxious or maybe aside from being anxious - I am not sure - I can be intimidated easily and quite fearful. Relatively minor things make me scared and things which the average (whatever that is) person would find a bit scary I find terrifying. One day a few weeks ago I was walking down the road with my Louis Vuitton handbag in the undesirable area in which I live and this guy said to me "That's a nice bag. Is it real?". To which I too quickly replied "No. I wish". I was immediately scared that I was in danger of being mugged. Not right then but in the future. The feeling increased and I felt totally crushed as though I had a big black cloud hanging over my head and as though I was destined to be attacked. It was all I could think about and when I got home I burst into tears. My husband understood why I was scared but said my reaction was too much which I already realised for myself. But the problem is that knowing it's over the top does not make it go away. I thought that something really has to change. I need to do something empowering and demonstrative. I have liked the idea of Karate since I was a child and never got around to it through laziness and fear. Now I am doing it because of fear. To get rid of it. I had my first lesson today and loved it so much. I really hope it will help and believe it is already increasing my confidence.
As for the diet, well I am still tweaking that around. I really am one hungry monster. I think years of watching what I eat has made me think diet food is the norm when in fact people not wishing to loose weight really need a whole lot more. Especially when they run and do Karate! We're going out for dinner tonight as it's my Birthday on Monday (not an ideal night to go out). Dessert or not? We'll see.